The story so far

Hi all!

It’s been a minute, I know. That said, much has happened over that last few months– a whole lot of good, some meh, but I wouldn’t change a thing!

I woke up

I’ll be honest, when I first moved back to California, the transition was TOUGH. It was the first time in years that I couldn’t hide behind family/work/friend obligations to excuse my lack of “living” so to speak. I was in a brand new city, which meant I had a lot of time to myself to think. Finally, I realized that I didn’t recognize the person I saw in the mirror and slowly started to change.

I learned how to use my brain

I’ve been considered gifted since I was a child, but I never fully understood what that meant or that it affects how I live. I just thought I was a weirdo because my ideas were so drastically different than those around me. When I was a kid, I was just so terrified of thinking differently than my peers, that I spent a crap-ton of time analyzing people; how they thought, how they talked, their emotional responses, and what they were interested in/etc, just to fit in. If I could describe it, I felt (and still feel) like a robot trying to understand human emotions. Once I realized that the “feelings” I felt were projections of those around me, it changed the game completely! For instance, I love thinking in concepts and how it impacts the world around me.

I prefer to think logically

This is a weird balance for me as I’m both logical and emotional. It’s a balance that I’m working on but I tend to stick with my logic when dealing with myself and I’ll be more emotional with others. For example, I honestly don’t care what I wear, as I find that it’s a waste of brain power (at least for me). I recognize that it’s an art form or way of life for others, and completely respect that. But for me, a t-shirt and jeans are just fine. In fact, if the world wouldn’t lock me up, I’d wear the same thing everyday. Really, I’d prefer to run around in my boy shorts, but indecent exposure and all of that jazz, lol. My thought process is that of efficiency. If it doesn’t stimulate my mind in some way, I don’t value it. Which brings me to my next point, which has also gotten me into a lot of trouble as of late.

Feelings are feelings, not dogma

Somewhere down the child-rearing line, we’ve been taught that feelings are so deep and precious, almost to a fault. One of the biggest things I’ve come to realize for myself, is that though I’m a sensitive being (somewhere on the highly sensitive person spectrum), I don’t put much stock in them as they’re unreliable and irrational. Those who are close to me have said I’ve become cold, but that couldn’t be further from the truth! I feel and empathize greatly. That said, I acknowledge those feelings and allow them to pass. When I held onto every feeling I had, it was maddening! So, just to be clear, I’m not saying feelings are a bad thing. On the contrary, they’re wonderful, but you need to keep them in perspective.

I quit being lazy

One of the first things I discovered was that, I wasn’t depressed, I was lazy. That may sound harsh, but it’s true. It’s true, we have emotions, that said, we can control how we react to said emotions. Instead of sitting around trying to numb myself, I began to volunteer, help others, and work on creative projects. Also, being outside and surrounded by nature is just such a great feeling for me! I’m more inclined to go for a walk or hike than anything else at this point. Interestingly enough, I found that I had an abundance of energy and emotional satisfaction that I had to give up caffeine!

I love tea and I’m hyperactive!!!!

My final experiment (which caused me to drop 60 pounds in 2 months), was giving up caffeine/surgery energy drinks. The detox period was terrible, but what I discovered is that I’m naturally hyper (apparently being gifted and ADHD goes hand in hand). I wake up around 4:30 every morning, walk 5-8 miles with Abbey and then I start my day. I can’t tell you how TREMENDOUS this has been for my mind. In my head, I have about 18 TV screens that focus on different aspects of my life. I blame my parents as they’re both gifted in their own right (Dad: musical genius, Mom: literary genius). It’s no wonder my mind is INSANE! Growing up, my house was constantly filled with music (all my siblings and I play multiple instruments), books, and intellectual/critical thinking conversations, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised on how I think.

Sometimes the world is wrong

I think for me, and those who are like me, living according to what the world expects is just not possible. I can’t work in a 9-5 setting because I complete office tasks within a quarter of the timeframe, and sitting around doing nothing is like Hell on Earth for me. Further, I think more in a compartmentalized manner, which is usually a trait ascribed to men. I don’t participate in a lot of “girly things” and would much rather be involved in my thoughts and projects rather than anything else.  This is frustrating as it leads to me being misunderstood (i.e. cold or obtuse). But meh, I’m working on it. As I venture out into the world with a better sense of who I am and how I operate, life is so much more fun!

What’s next?

I’ll still try and blog from time to time, but I find that I don’t like talking about myself all that much. I will, however, be blogging about freelancing and how to navigate that world a lot more on another site I have. I’m currently reworking it, so be on the lookout for an update come Monday!

 

Back from the…

ok, I get it- I suck at blogging regularly.

Hello friends! I have been busy… with life! While I can’t pour my heart and soul into this post, I’ll give you a few quick bullet points on the life of Taryn as of late. Continue reading “Back from the…”

Strategic Sunday: Terminal Uniqueness

Greetings!

Here I am, returning from the shadows of obscurity. It’s been quite a while. A lot has changed and a lot has remained the same. That was my hipster way of saying that I’ve been running in circles waiting for the sky to fall these last few months. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had some great achievements, and I’ve had some learning moments.

Terminal Uniqueness 

First, I’d like to say that no, I’m not a recovering alcoholic (though my mom seems to think so, more on that later). That said, the term “terminal uniqueness”– which is commonly referred to in A.A.– is the belief that the situation the individual is facing is unlike anything faced by other people. Now, if I’m being honest, when I go to my mopey “all hope is lost” place, I tend to think my “isms” are soooo different than what everyone else is facing.

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I mean obviously, no one could possibly understand my life. 2 parents that are still married who are unconditionally supportive of their daughter, friends that care, and a career that is gaining speed? Sheesh, the horror.

As I venture out into the world, I am reminded that my road has been traveled and I don’t have to go it alone. I’m coming to the understanding that I’m not a special little snowflake, and I’m finding comfort in the fact that I’m more human than I give myself credit. Now I am tasked with the pesky chore of connecting with my fellow humans. I’m a little rusty, but I’m working on it!

What’s Next…

So, I’m getting back into the blogging swing of things and I have a bunch of goodies to share. I had an epic 26th birthday in October, killed it in freelance writing in terms of earnings in the last 2 months, I’m “taking pride in my appearance” (again, more on that later), and volunteering at the library. In a nutshell, I’m back! So get ready, because I mean it this time! Happy Sunday!

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Strategic Sunday Pt. ???: Back From the Dead

Why hello there!

After not blogging for about 6 weeks, I am finally making a resurgence. In the spirit of transparency, I’ve been allowing life to throw me around mercilessly, causing everything to transform into a giant snowball that has left me to retreat under my covers and avoid everything at all costs. Fortunately, I break that cycle today.

Don’t worry, it hasn’t all been chaos and conspiracy theories. Life has treated me well, I’m just working on the coping and “rolling with the punches part”. I’ve also come to realize that I missed blogging, as it helps me stay balanced– so here I am– getting back to the basics.

This week: I’ll be posting some funny updates about my shenanigans and my freelancing work (spoiler alert: it’s been crazy! In a good way though). So sit back and enjoy, because I’m back! Happy Sunday!

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                              Via: Pinterest

I’m not a teenager anymore

Earlier today, I stumbled across an album that meant a great deal to me circa 2005. Upon playing it, I transcended time and was shot back to the days where I was around 15/16. Continue reading “I’m not a teenager anymore”

Babies, Brunch, and an Art Walk

I’m enjoying my last day here in Santa Barbara. It has been an incredibly relaxing and restorative adventure; plus hanging out with my best friend is awesome in of in itself. Now that she’s a mom (with another on the way), it’s safe to say the dynamic of our activities has changed drastically.  Continue reading “Babies, Brunch, and an Art Walk”

The Perks of Snail Mail Pt. 2

A while back, I talked about writing letters to my best friend back home. As it stands, it’s still something I continue to this day. In fact, I’ve expanded my little operation to a few more friends in Cali and Hawaii. Continue reading “The Perks of Snail Mail Pt. 2”

Strategic Sunday Pt. 2

Right now, I’m posted up in a new Starbucks. I’ve decided that I’m going to be different and try and write in as many different locations I can. This shouldn’t be too difficult as there are 15 Starbucks locations within a 5 miles radius of my apartment. Continue reading “Strategic Sunday Pt. 2”

Strategic Sunday: Getting My Sh*t Together

Happy Sunday!

As I sit in Starbucks, pretending to get life in order this week, I have made a few goals for this upcoming week. Since sharing is caring here are a few things you can expect from this caffeinated junkie.

  • #100DayProject

As you guys know, I started the 100 Days of Writing last Monday. Now, I’d be lying if I told you these last 7 days have gone perfectly (they haven’t). My new goal is to blurb about my progress at least once a day. A short and quick update on how the project is going. It will help keep me accountable (or so I hope).

  • Freelance writing projects

I’ve got a lot on my plate in terms of projects that I’m working on, which is great! I really am attempting to stay on top of my work and making sure my clients are 110% thrilled with my work. I also have some articles that I need to finish by today so they can be published this week! One of my editors needed some content asap for this week, so with any luck, I’ll post a few bylines during the week.

  • Quality friendship time

I’ve been shirking my friend duties (although, I did go to a Milky Chance concert last week, more on that later). All work and no play makes for a mopey and anxiety-filled Taryn.

  • Working on my fitness

Yeah… my ass has seen better days.

  • Freelance Fridays

I will be starting a weekly post on all of my freelance dealings. A lot of times, freelance writers paint the profession as a “romantic” and “work free” love affair where you sit on your pretty little bum, collecting checks with minimal effort. So not true. As with any other self-run business, there is a lot of hustling, hard work, and dedication that comes with it. There, I’ll talk about my experiences, answer any questions you may have for me, and give helpful tips to any aspiring freelancers. I’ve made a few triumphs and a bunch of mistakes, so if you can learn from me and skip some pitfalls, I’m happy to help!

Anywho, that is what’s on the docket for this week. I hope everyone has a splendid, productive week ahead of them. 🙂